Remember When It Rained
by dollyrot
Summary: Tears for you that will not dry – they magnify the one within and let the outside slowly die. Jackie Gayda x Alex Shelley x SoCal Val x Chris Sabin


**Remember When It Rained**

**Title:** Remember When It Rained

**Rating:** PG

**Pairings:** Jackie Gayda x Alex Shelley x SoCal Val x Chris Sabin  
**  
Summary:** Tears for you that will not dry – they magnify the one within and let the outside slowly die.

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own the WWE, TNA or any of the characters used. Lyrics from "Remember When It Rained" are credit to Josh Groban. Lovely song.

_Wash away the thoughts inside  
That keep my mind away from you.  
No more love and no more pride  
And thoughts are all I have to do_

* * *

_Fuck you_.

It wasn't the most beautiful message she'd ever received in her life. She looked down at the black Nokia 6288 slider phone that her slender fingers clung lightly to. Her eyes eased shut as she concentrated on blocking out the message she'd just received with sad music, hoping it would help down away her heartache. The damned tunes were not working their usual magic tonight.

She sighed and hung her head once more, letting strands of her silky blonde locks cascade over her sad, tired eyes. The song had changed, to some annoyingly catchy pop song, but she couldn't care less. Her head throbbed with thoughts of what had happened last night in her sleep: the bliss of being close to Chris once more, and then having the world crash around her upon reading Alex's message. Just reminiscing made her knees buckle and her heart twinge in a dull pain. True, she could not put the blame entirely on someone else, she had played a role in this tragic story, but that didn't stop it from hurting any less.

A week ago, Alex had come to her with a secret, and that was when everything had changed.

"_If I talk to you about something," the multi-colour haired man had tapped her on the shoulder, talking to her. "Can you promise it's never repeated?"_

_She turned around and looked at him, slightly startled. A worried expression was playing at his features, deepening as he spoke his next words: "Never? Not to the person? Not to Chris? No one?" _

_He put so much stress on the word no one, she was surprised the word didn't collapse from the amount of pressure he was placing on it. Still, she nodded her response._

"_Of course. Cross my heart."_

"_I don't know if I can get the help I need for this…" he mumbled under his breath, glancing down at his hands. "__**None**__ of this gets out. No hints to anyone you know something, fucking nothing… or God help you, you will regret it."_

_She was starting to get freaked out, but again repeated her promise of silence. He nodded with mundane finality and looked back up at her._

"_Okay so, on New Years'… there's a possibility that Val and I hooked up."_

"_Oh Jesus…" She couldn't help it; she placed her head in her hands. Alex's best friend was Chris Sabin, and he'd been in love with the redheaded spitfire for over two years. Alex was well aware of his friend's feelings for the girl, naturally – as was the rest of the world. Val herself was aware, and had expressed similar feelings back towards the man. The only reason they weren't together yet was because she claimed she was not ready for a relationship, and the thought of them ever being together, and something bad happening to them and effectively ruining their friendship for good, scared the living daylights out of her. _

_To hear such news was not exactly welcome._

"_I don't want to hear details." She cut him off before he could talk about it anymore. "I just want to know – are either of you going to tell Chris?"_

"_No," Alex shook his head. "That's a bad idea. He heard we spent New Years' together and already threatened me. It would be bad for his health if I told him we did anything more. We made the decision not to tell him. Which means you can't either."_

She meant to keep her promise, she really did. A week after he'd spilled his guts to her, she'd been talking to Chris. He already had his suspicions about it, apparently rumours were flying. And then he told her that Alex had been on his case about the rumours, apparently offended that Sabin would even entertain the thought of him and Val ever being together, and had threatened to effectively end their friendship if Chris didn't believe him.

And she couldn't help it. She snapped.

_Jackie smiled hesitantly as she glanced at her friend. He looked so happy, and he truly seemed to feel that he and Val would be together some day. A pool of sorrow began to swell in her heart as she contemplated whether to tell him or not. _

"_Can I talk to you?" What was she thinking? Could she do this? __**Should **__she do this? It meant breaking a promise. It meant breaking a heart. It meant choosing Chris over Alex. Of course she had to tell him! She was her best friend, and she wouldn't have anyone do something like that to her... even if it were her brother. Her brows knitted in frustration. _

"_Jackie, what's wrong?" Genuine worry was plastered on Chris's face._

"_Maybe we should sit down." She glanced toward the metal bench that stood a short ways away. They were at an Impact taping. Alex had already left for the evening, the two of them were some of the few even still around. The brown-eyed Knockout trudged over toward the seat, still obviously uneasy._

"_Jackie, stop stalling, and tell me what's wrong." Chris was almost desperate to know now - he hated seeing someone so dear to him be plagued with something awful._

"_Chris... this isn't something easy for me to tell you." Jackie paused, sucking in a deep breath._

_A deeper look of worry shone in Chris's light, electric blue eyes. "What is it? You know you can tell me anything. I promise I will do anything I can to help. What does it have to do with?"_

"_You."_

"_Me?" he asked, confused._

"_It has to do with you..." Jackie paused, staring intensely at her. "And Val."_

"_Val? How does this have to do with Val?" Chris uttered, his face showing sheer disarray._

"_I know things have been going great with you two, and you both look so happy, like you belong together. And I know that you love her, Chris. I don't doubt that for a second. But what she's doing isn't right. What Alex is doing isn't right. They're hurting you, and you don't deserve it. You deserve better!" She threw her hands in the air, frustration and anger flowing from her words._

"_What?" Chris was still in a mix of confusion. "Jackie, calm down. You're not making any sense. Val hasn't done anything wrong. And neither has Alex. He told me so."_

"_I'm so sorry, Chris." Tears brimmed Jackie's coffee brown eyes. "I really wanted you two to work out, I honestly did!"_

"_Jackie, don't cry. Come on, you'll ruin your make-up." Chris patted his friend's back gently. "What are Val and Alex doing? They've haven't done anything."_

"_Yes they have! They're doing everything wrong!"_

_Chris was shocked at Jackie's sudden outburst. Sure they were friends, but listening to her call the love of his life and his best friend liars stung. It also surprised him in that he had suspected that Jackie herself was in love with Alex. Four months before, the two of them had succumbed to temptation and had kissed; madly, deeply. It hadn't gone further, and nothing had happened since. So was it just a cruel plan of Jackie's? To get what __**she**__ really wanted? "What? How? ... Why?"_

_Jackie calmed herself by taking in another gulp of the cool evening air. "They got together on New Years'."_

_Chris froze, his face paling and pulse stalling. "They... what?" He slowly slurred the words unbelievingly._

"_They got together on New Years'."_

_His blue eyes dulled, as he slumped onto the cold, stone bench in a daze. "He lied?" His voice quivered; he was devastated by the news. He looked like the life had been sucked out of him._

Of course Chris had gone straight to Alex. The phone had come out straight out of his pocket. Whatever Chris did depended on whether Alex denied it or admitted it. Chris asked him, out-right, did he do anything with Val? And he lied. Then he went to Val. He wanted to know. She lied too. She denied it ever having happened. Alex wasn't lying when he'd told Jackie they had agreed to never tell him about it.

Once Val had received the phone call, she went straight to Alex. Naturally, Alex put the pieces together. Jackie had obviously played some kind of role in this. She'd been the only one he'd ever told.

At 12:09 am exactly, she received a message from him.

_Fuck you._

Thirty minutes later, she received another.

_I'm never fucking speaking to you ever again. You have ruined my life._

It was only fitting that she be forced to see him, week in, week out. It was only fitting that she'd be in the same room as him and not be allowed to say a word. It was only fitting that she'd be so damn close to him and he couldn't – wouldn't – even look her in the eye.

She and Chris bonded like they never had before, and probably never would've had this never happened. He came to her when he wanted to complain, and she used him as a shoulder to cry on. Perhaps they weren't true friends; perhaps they didn't even really like each other anymore. But for those few days; weeks; months, they needed each other – like they had never needed a person before. To each other, they were comfort in the form of a person.

And then, it happened.

Five months later.

Alex spoke to her.

They were standing around after a show, trying to decide on the groups of people who would be riding in their twelve seat mini-bus back to the hotel with them. They were staying in a hotel because they weren't in Orlando, and they were traveling by mini bus because they'd turned it into a road trip. They'd need to take two trips, there was so many of them staying there. In the midst of all the excitement, the Knockout had forgotten her former friend and love would be there too.

When she looked back on it, she barely remembered their conversation. She put this down to being so flabbergasted he was speaking to her – that words had actually come out of his mouth – that she'd forgotten to take note of it.

At the hotel, it was different. Somehow, she'd ended up standing in the hallway with him – and Kevin and Austin. Somehow, the promoter's booking for at least fifteen of the wrestlers on the show had gone awry and said fifteen wrestlers were left without a room to stay. Luckily, she, and a few others, had checked in earlier and had spaces to crash.

Kevin and Austin wandered off down the hallway. Kevin and Austin also inadvertently left her alone with Alex.

He looked at her. She looked at him. He spoke first.

"Uh, nice hair. I mean, you got it done like two months ago, but it's still nice."

She blushed. "Thanks." He still had that effect on her.

The next few hours were absolute bliss. He agreed to crash in her room! Granted, he was drinking, but should she put his niceness down to that? It seemed like too much of a heart-breaking thing to do. He was being friendly again. He was smiling at her again. He was looking her in the eye again. And as soon as he did that, she was flooded with memories. A sense of nostalgia took over her as she savored the pleasant recollections of her months past. She played video games with him, feeling like an adolescent; laughed, danced, fought, trained, ate, and slept – not literally - with him through months of what she could call 'amazing'. They were the months when she and Alex bonded, where she and Alex had tackled each other, where they'd cried and bitched and ranted and moaned during hour long phone calls, where she incessantly pestered him into training her, where she and the rest of their friends made green faces at his cooking. Where they'd kissed for the first time.

A sour taste crept into her mouth. They were also the months where she first fell in love with Alex.

They talked and laughed all night. He flirted. She tried hard not to flirt back. Finally, at some absurd hour in the morning, Traci decided to hit the hay and call it a night. She'd stolen the double bed earlier, and the two of them had been sharing it, but now, she had been replaced by Kaz, whom was already lying inside of it, sleeping like a baby.

Alex was lying on the top bunk. Again, he looked at her, and again, she looked back. He gestured for her to come up. Stupidly, she did.

The moment she was up there, she felt his arm wrap around her waist. Jackie shivered. The things the slightest touch could do to her. He used his strength to turn her around; to look at him. And when she did, he leaned down and he kissed her. The blonde bombshell couldn't ever remember a moment in her life when she had felt so happy and so sad at the same time. It was like someone had plunged a fork right into her stomach and twisted around her insides. It was like her heart had puffed up like a balloon and was going to explode. She'd tasted this before, had memorized everything about his kiss. To have something as beautiful as that and then to have it abruptly taken away from her made her want to die inside. She wanted to tell him everything, to tell him that she was sorry and to tell him that she had never wanted any of what did happen to happen. To tell him that ever letting him go was the biggest mistake she had made in her life. To tell him that she cared about him – that a part of her always would. To tell him that she loved him more than he would ever know or realise.

That night they got much further than they ever had in the past. That night they did things they could probably never take back, and things they might never do again. It was just as it had been before though… she had gotten everything she had ever desired, only to have it taken away from her when he'd had to leave at 5 am to catch a plane.

There was no word afterwards, not for a week anyway. And the only word she received was that "he guessed" they "might be" on "okay terms" once more.

What would it take for things to change? What would it take for her to break, once and for all?

When it rained, it truly did pour.

* * *

I wasn't really one hundred percent sure how to end this. Just thought I'd let people know that this thing is actually a true story, with some details changed, and is probably one of the most honest/sincere things that I have ever written before. Reviews would really be appreciated!


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